Kihim

Kihim is one of the most relaxing places I have ever visited. a rocky beach near the very visited alibaug,It has a calmness about it that is very eerie. A lot of people might not agree with me as it is one of the most visited beaches from Mumbai, I guess for me it was the company,the place.. And the fact I was away from all stress and problems. We stayed at pednekars bungalow.. Now its not really a bungalow... the room is crappy and the loo is outside the room.. But who cares when the moment you step out of the room you step into sand... it’s on the beach!!!!! He has attempted to make a little shack outside and has succeeded quite a lot with the thatched umbrella and the wooden benches. He has an amazing cook for a wife who will make the most delicious fried fish and prawn curry ... total maharashtrian style, all you have to do is take a mat lie under the umbrella and watch the sky change, occasionally just shoo ff a cat or a puppy :).

The sea is so wondrous, all these years i lived in Bombay (in bandra, worli) so close to the sea yet i didn’t notice how ever-changing it is, which is what makes is so very beautiful. Two days seemed like two weeks... that’s pure relaxation.. Jahnvi, Megha and I share a great relationship.. We don’t need to talk in order to communicate. Holidays should be with friends like this.. Lying on the beach at night, listening to someone strum the guitar, eat good food, drink good alcohol.. can be any ordinary beach party but something happened to us that weekend, nothing was ordinary.. we all needed the break so much that we were living every single minute of the day. I don’t remember the last time I had done that. Without saying a word we realised that some bonds last forever, people come and go but friends stay. We spoke about what a long way each one of us has come in the past 9 years, despite all the jobs, the men, the trials and the tribulations... we still can be ourselves with each other.

I guess that was the reason we could live each moment and relax, we were ourselves.

An hour away from the gateway of India by ferry is nothing, its like going from andheri to town on any normal working day. What took us so long to step out??

Morning

A dark sheet lifted ..
Emerged a bright yellow sphere,
Luminous, dazzling, shinning..
Reflected on her glazed skin
Soaked into her palms,
Sunk deep into her eyes,
Touched her soul,
Fulfilling,
Nourishing,
Complete.

Something i found again ... written last year in march ...

Every time I reach a destination I prepare to leave. Be it a two day weekend break, a month long vacation or a year.

As soon as I reach I fear the day ill have to leave. The initial time is spent on adjusting to the fact that i'm here finally and then the rest few in the end is spent on being anxious about my departure. Little time is left, where I truly get don’t to cherish where I am, who I am with and what i’m doing here

I am a forever moving person. Moving drives me it keeps me going. I can never stay in a place for more than two months at a stretch. I have to get away. Ideally I would love to get away every month or Maybe lesser, but the money doesn’t permit it right now.
On my way to Ahmedabad this time I realized my favorite feeling in the whole world. It is the feeling I get when the aero plane takes off. Most people would get sick at the thought of that, but for me it is a beginning to something that’s different, something that’s new. An adventure i’m going to embark upon. Every time a plane takes off or the train leaves the station or the bus moves I get the same feeling.
It is not this time I am concerned about or the time I leave that place to go to the other, they are beautiful experiences, a journey towards the unknown is always beautiful in the beginning.
I am concerned about the time I spend in between, the time that doesn’t measure in thought.
I try to segregate time into three parts- my entering, living and exiting the journey. Should I actually do so? Or should I merge all into one whole exciting episode that I am experiencing.
It takes practice I guess.
That’s why in a jiffy time passes by and I realize I’m leaving tomorrow and then the fretting starts about how I don’t want to leave…. And then I prepare to start another journey and go through the same thing again.
I start giving myself excuses. And I continue to do the same.

Isn’t life just the same?

We are on a forever journey along the universe from one body to another from one city to another across space and time. Each time we embark upon a new journey we are anxious.
From the second we are born the journey is marked as an important arrival date. The initial years go in adjusting ourselves to the new surroundings, new people, learning there ways of life, learning of what they term as right and wrong, good and bad.
We forget in time that why did we ever even come here?

By the time we get a reality check it’s late.
We all get reality checks, the universe conspires it. It didn’t send you on this journey for nothing.
Of course for many of us by the time the reality check happens we are nearing the completion of the journey and then we start panicking over the amount of time we have lost and we see the end so near. Most of the time is then spent on worrying or on trying to find new roads and ways to reach the end appropriately.
It’s the time in between we hardly remember.
The day we depart is also marked as an important date. What about the time in between?
Who marks these dates? Dates that are special maybe just to you. Dates that might be etched on your subconscious and forgotten by the conscious mind in the daily rush rush and busy life.
There are also dates we missed out on, dates we forgot, dates we didn’t think were important or we thought we could delay to do that.

Do I come back to the place I visited before? Sometimes I do, at times I keep coming back. But each time I sit on that air plane my agenda is different. There are different people to meet, different work to do. I get the chance to live and relive the journey time and time again but each time there are other things on my mind.

And time just flies.

If I would slow down a little and stop and smell the flowers as that say….
If I would stop a bit and look at the people who entered and left my life and the very few who have stayed on. If I see each one of them as someone so unique who changed my immediate universe upside down in a good/bad way.

Then I forever love them.

I gaze at the clouds outside the tiny airplane window. Amazed at the out of world experience I am having right now, I wish it would just stay like this in-between the clouds.
Reality check- The plane lands.
Well… it’s just the beginning…..

Aanchal
24.03.06

Run away

I was going through some old stuff i wrote on scraps of paper... I came across this poem ... I dont remember who i wrote this for, when and even why! I cant relate to the emotions i must have gone through while writing this anymore.. they seem so alien ... this is the ability we have to move on in life .. Pain that seemed unbearable ... vanishes into the darkness of your past...

Run away

I need to get away, run away,
From you, from your attitudes
From that face I’ve got to know so well
From the smell that lingers around me all day.
I need to run away,

I need to get away, run away,
From the stolen kisses,
The secret smiles,
From the tender ways you cared
I need to run away,

I need to get away, run away,
From the pain I’ve learnt to live with,
From the hurt your harsh words bring to me
From the love that’s vanished away
Yet grows somewhere deep in my heart,I need to run away.